Monday, May 31, 2010

Step on up!

...its time to take responsibility for what I have done.   I had to go and purchase a special scale that would be able to withstand my weight.  I would rely on the scale at the doctors office, however the last time I stepped on it, it actually said "Max Limit".  Wow... as if numbers weren't ugly enough, now the scale is telling me I've reached max capacity.  If you've followed my other blog in the past, you know I've been having constant struggles with my weight.  I started 2010 out weighing 415 pounds.  I'm certain that I've weighed more then that over the past year, but that was my highest number recorded. 

In the past, I've been very ashamed and embarassed of who I am.  What I have made myself to be, a 31 year old Morbidly Obese woman.  But it's time for me to face myself.  Putting the truth on my blog, in words and pictures.  So many Weight Blogs don't list weights or measurements and they rarely post any pictures of them.  I'm working on pictures and measurements and will post them as soon as I can.  No more hiding behind this 400 pound body.  That's 4 super models! or 3 average size adults femalesor a playground full of children!

I stepped on my scale this week and was very excited to see me below the 400 pound mark. 398.6.  This is a huge step for me, I never tell my weight to anyone.  But I've realized I have to face this journey and take the world head on.  I've spent many years not going places and not having cute clothes because I was afraid of the world and what they might say.  I've been hurt so many times by total strangers in my life then anyone should ever have too. I'm putting it all out there to overcome a lot of fears and face what I've done to my body and life. I'm ready to start living life for the first time.  I'm not letting anyone get me down anymore.  Look out world, here I come!

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